Thursday, May 24, 2007

You Make Me Wanna...

The other day Pamala sent me a link to her horrible roommate's boyfriend's blog. He is possibly the most boring person on the face of the earth. Here's the conversation that ensued:


Pamala: sorry
Pamala: just got home

Sarah: i wanted to talk crap about bryan's blog
Sarah: which was pysically painful to read

Pamala: so incredibly boring
Pamala: i scanned

Sarah: please go and click on view my full profile

Pamala: holy crap
Pamala: still
Pamala: falcon's eyes
Pamala: for gods sake

Sarah: what is he socrates

Pamala: no, look at the "welcome"
Pamala: holy gold
Pamala: i can't stop laughting
Pamala: wtf

Sarah: interesting happenings of his life?
Sarah: seriously??

Pamala: yeah

Sarah: ok did you look at the profile yet

(The part I'm talking about goes like this: there is a random question on the profile. His was "Please describe how you could take the peel off an apple all in one go: " His answer was "What would we do if we had the power to change human history? What would we change? Who would we stop, let go, save, kill?")

Pamala: but would you respond to how to peel an apple with a series of questions

Sarah: apparently if we had the power to change human history (time travel?) we would...peel...apples...?
Sarah: please please please look at his favorite musoc
Sarah: music
Sarah: muSUCK
Sarah: and books?
Sarah: i want to STAB something

Pamala: hahahahahahahahaha
Pamala: this is about the opposite person i would be interested in
Pamala: btw orly is coming

(Orly was my roommate senior year. She is the embodiment of awesome.)

Sarah: WHEN

Pamala: unless she backs out last minute again
Pamala: maybe saturday night

Sarah: she sent one cancellation already...

Pamala: but dave and i yelled at her over a conference call

Sarah: i can't take this back and forth, up and down

Pamala: breaks your heart a lil each time?

Sarah: and my poor heart can't take these games

(Here's where things get a little muddled, per usual)

Pamala: he is seriously incredibly horribly boring
Pamala: holy god

Sarah: it is sooooooo depressing

Pamala: i just read the questions to his answer the peel

Sarah: but then you forget why you are depressed
Sarah: and then you just are for no reason

Pamala: wait is this orly or bryan

Sarah: its like how being around stupid people makes you dumb

Pamala: b/c both make me depressed

Sarah: bryan

Pamala: okay that is what I thought

Sarah: because he is so forgettable
Sarah : i could never forget orly

Pamala: ahh its just terrible
Pamala: but its true
Pamala: yes to orly

Sarah: bryan just makes me want to kill myself

Pamala: agree
Pamala: it's

Sarah: i like how it was all like one week in february

Pamala: haha didn't even notice
Pamala: it's like his concentration was for one week

Sarah: this is concentration?

Pamala: well for him, i am guessing yes

Sarah: and the best part is that i KNOW that blogger has a spell check

Pamala: haha and he didn't utilize it

(You will have to go look yourself if you want to see what these are about. It's very short, but it is painful.)

Sarah: at ALL
Sarah: did you see "quant"

Pamala: ohmygod did you "sement"

Sarah: or just not quite getting phrases right

Pamala: did you see "sement"!

Sarah: i seriously felt a pain

Pamala: it makes me wonder what this world is coming to

Sarah: sement... it hurts me pam

Pamala: hhahahaha me too

Sarah: my brain...
Sarah: it is stunned

Pamala: and then he gets philosophical about the sement

Sarah: i just almost spit out wine all over my compnuter

Pamala: so bad
Pamala: it's just so bad
Pamala: i don't think i have ever been so shocked about the retardedness of a person before

(In this next bit, notice how I break out in song, and also notice how Pamala completely ignores it. Another failed attempt to woo Pam. Sigh...)

Sarah: paula?
Sarah: well that wasnt really "shocking"
Sarah: oooh usher
Sarah: you make me wanna

Pamala: hahaha i thought that too

Sarah: leave the one i'm with

Pamala: it's definitely brian

Sarah: start a neeeew relationship
Sarah : wit chu

Pamala: at least paula was sort memorable....not her personality per se
Pamala: but the hair
Pamala: and the pants

Sarah: and her face

Pamala: when she smiled
Pamala: or stared at us

Sarah: i swear to god i though she would try to kill at least one of us

Pamala: i thought it was going to be me

Sarah: i was the biggest bitch to her

Pamala: after the 500th time playing "you'll see" from Rent
Pamala: ahh but you would take her out

Sarah: yeah but i could have been up in my bed-nest dead for days

Pamala: hhaha this is true
Pamala: and orly doesn't pay attention
Pamala: so she wouldn't have noticed

Sarah: she would have been like sarah's sure quiet. hm
Sarah: and then move on

Pamala: just been like...hmm she must be sleeping

Sarah: she usually bugs the shit out of me
Sarah: hm
Sarah: thats what i miss about her the most
Sarah: hearing her go hm

Pamala: orly went hmmm?

Sarah: she did it really short
Sarah: kinda like huh
Sarah: but no u

Pamala: i have to pay attention
Pamala: isn't it funny how it's such the little things

Sarah: totally
Sarah: or i would be talking to her
Sarah: and she would never listen
Sarah: and i would stop
Sarah: and then she would go haaaaaaaa?

Pamala: ahh how i miss that stuff too

Sarah: i'm getting all teary
Sarah: she has to come

Pamala: i know
Pamala: she doesn't realize how much we miss her

Sarah: i swear to god i'm gonna cry when i see her next
Sarah: the emotional precipice i'm on right now?

Pamala: hahah i have totally cried over her before

Sarah: there will be tears
Sarah: this is so weird
Sarah: i've never cried over a girl before

Pamala: oh i have totally
Pamala: over friendships being lost
Pamala: over someone leaving
Pamala: totally
Pamala: i cried when orly left sb

Sarah: well i did cry when i thought you were mad at me and i didnt know why

Pamala: haha when was this?
Pamala: see do i not count as a girl?

Sarah: after game night disaster

Pamala: oh yeah that was horrible

Sarah: no i'm correcting myself

Pamala: i was annoyed at the world

Sarah: clearly

Pamala: vhateva yo

Sarah: you and orly
Sarah: thats it

Pamala: haha well I am glad
Pamala: we are important

Sarah: top o the list
Sarah: what should i write about tomorrow

Pamala: uuum your love for me and olrs

Sarah: probably

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