A Little Less Conversation

I had an incident yesterday that left me flat-out stunned. I am rarely rendered speechless, but this had me literally mouth-open-nothing-coming-out-speechless. Ok, let me set the scene. After a glorious three hours on the beach with Pam, I was a bit peckish, so we went over to Mika, my go-to sushi place. It's not the greatest, but it's there and it's not bad. I headed up to order, a little sad that the guy that normally works the counter was out on break.
The girl behind the counter seemed nice enough though, asking me how I was. I replied that I was fine, who could not be on such a warm, sunny day. Which is when it began. I kid you not, within five minutes I was informed that she was, in fact, very much not fine, because she, like, had on this bra, and it was, like, too tight on her and, like, pinch her boobs, and she only had it on because she, like, went on this date last night and she hadn't had time to, like, change or anything, y'know? And, like, when it gets all hot and stuff, she, like, retains a lot of, like, water, or whatever, and so she was, like, swollen up on top of her, like, really tight bra that, like, she doesn't even know why she wore it, even though it's, like, really sexy, because guys, like, totally don't even care and she could have just, like worn a tank top and shorts, or something, and, like, he wouldn't have noticed, right?